I’m learning to accept that I will have meltdowns from time to time. I’m learning that it does not mean that I’m a bad person. Today I had a meltdown. I had prolonged periods of frustration and anxiety and it eventually built up.
I feel very upset and then all of a sudden I am crying and I feel like I am choking. Tears are falling and I walk over to to the stairs and hold onto the railing. I then retreat to my bedroom and cry. I feel like a can’t breathe one minute and then I am doing SIB head smacking the next. After a couple of minutes, the meltdown subsides and I feel better.
I’m learning to also recognise the signs that when I’m going to have a meltdown. I know that distracting myself would be a good coping strategy but, I need to recognise the signs of getting near to the meltdown so that I can try to stop the meltdown. I know my triggers for my meltdowns, so I’m going to try to avoid these triggers as much as possible.
- Sensory overload
- Prolonged Anxiety
Yes, I know the SIB is not good. Sometimes I just feel so frustrated that I just feel a strong urge to smack myself on the head over and over again.
So, to my fellow Autistics, it’s ok to have meltdowns. 🙂
photo credit: Send me adrift. <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/48220147@N07/12212866585″></a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>(license)</a>