Sometimes I find it too difficult to try to start a conversation. I would like to know how to start a conversation with my friend, but sometimes I just can’t get the words out. Usually, when neurotypical friends and family members are having conversations, I stay on the outside of the conversation.
My biggest challenge is not knowing what to talk about, and anxiety. I know I can’t talk about Horses and Autism all the time, but at the same time, I don’t know what to talk about. Neurotypicals also tend to switch subjects in conversations a lot too, which makes it more difficult to try to join in. So sometimes I have to sit in silence and stim, relax under my weighted lap pad, etc. Sometimes I don’t have the energy for socializing (running out of spoons). I may not have the automatic social skills like the neurotypicals, but I still don’t want to go unnoticed.
I think people sometimes automatically assume that because I’m quiet, I don’t want to engage. Another problem is the sensory issues, I find that I can only really have a conversation when there is no loud noise around me, otherwise, I get overstimulated and I have to go somewhere else. The best thing for me is when somebody asks me a question and I can engage with them. I really want to be included in conversations and activities, but I don’t know how to join in.
Sometimes the words just don’t come out.
photo credit: Dima Bushkov <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/30779267@N04/3764769359″>Silenсe</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/”>(license)</a>